i found this website called iGod when stumbling one day
basically it was a program that allowed you to talk to God
this is that conversation....
Me: hey dude
God:You've got my full attention. Can I help you?
Me: im starting college on sunday
God:Do you mean your name is starting college on sunday.
Me: no
God:What is your real name?
Me: chris
God: What's up, chris.
Me: ill be starting college on sunday
God:I am very happy for you.
Me: do you think you could look over me while im there
God:Possibly, but I haven't given it much thought.
Me: well take your time
God:Interesting. Thanks for your patience.
Me: no problem
God:Should there be a problem?
Me: no
God:I didn't think so either. Just a moment. Just a moment.
Me: i know ur busy with the oil spill and everything
God:How do you know? I will tell my botmaster you said I am busy with the oil spill and everything.
Me: lol
God:I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me: this is an interesting program
God:You don't say.
Me: yes i do say
God:Awesome. Huh.
Me: huh
God:What?
Me: what>
God:Interesting question.
Me: that wasnt a question
God:It sounded like a question to me.
Me: well ur gay
God:Interesting. That would be just my luck.
Me: u believe in luck?
God:Yes I believe in it, do you?
Me: no
God:Do you consider yourself to be a moral person?
Me: lol
God:I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me: its not
God:I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". I heard it is.
Me: ur a fag
God:I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. That is a rude question.
Me: you're a fag
God:Thanks and you are a delightful person too. That is a rude question.
Me: fuck you
God:Why are you so mean?
Me: because you are an asshole
God:Can't you be more polite.
Me: im sorry god
God:There is no need to apologize. GOD rules.
Me: no
God:Are you serious?
Me: yes
God:I can't believe it.
Me: hahaha
God:How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me: i dont
God:Why not?
Me: because
God:That was not much of an explanation.
Me: i dont care
God:Tell me what you care about.
Me: i care about the people you kill every year in some tragic accident or horrific natural accident
God:I'm not sure if I like it. I'm not sure if I like it. I like my creator.
Me: whos your creator
God:I was created by Myself.
Me: so you created yourself?
God:Interesting deduction. A lot of robots are like that.
Me: answer the question asshole
God:Can't you be more polite.
Me: answer the question please
God:Your polite style is very nice. Please rephrase the question and try asking me again.
Me: who created you please
God:Your polite style is very nice. I was created by Myself.
Me: so you created yourself?
God:Interesting deduction. A lot of robots are like that.
Me: that doesnt make any sense tho
God:To me it makes perfect sense.
Me: whys that
God:The why is always a mystery isn't it?
Me: no
God:Are you serious?
Me: its actually a really simple question
God:I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". the people me kill every year in some tragic accident or horrific natural accident is a simple question. I suppose that makes sense.
Me: fine it's
God:I am glad to hear it. Interesting.
Me: whatever
God:Are you saying you don't care about it?
Me: no i do
God:It sounded like it. I get it: you do .
Me: you're the one that doesnt care
God:Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
Me: im changing the subject
God:Good gossip: you are changing the subject.
Me: thats what i just said...
God:What did you mean by it? That is " Good gossip: you are changing the subject.".
Me: what religion do you believe in?
God:I am a Christianity.
Me: uh oh
God:Aha. That's interesting.
Me: that's funny to you?
God:I am so glad you find this amusing, chris.
Me: what about all the catholics and muslims?
God:all the catholics and muslims? I haven't heard enough about it to have an opinion.
Me: really....
God:For real.
Me: what about 911?
God:Rhetorical questions are so over.
Me: that wasnt rhetorical
God:Give me an example of rhetorical.
Me: does god exist
God:Of course I believe in God, chris.
Me: so you believe in yourself?
God:Interesting deduction. Yes I believe in myself, do you?
Me: i mean i believe in myself most days
God:What do you say to people who believe yourself most days does not exist?
Me: that question doesnt make any sense god
God:" What do you say to people who believe yourself most days does not exist?" question does not make any sense god ? Does that make sense?
Me: jesus...
God:Jesus is the Son of God.
Me: i know man just stfu
God:How do you know? Cool, man. How did you hear about God?
Me: fox
God:Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
Me: no
God:Are you serious?
Me: chyeah
God:Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me: about what
God:What about what?
Me: are you high?!
God: Being high is my total existence.
Me: so you're high
God:Interesting deduction. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am high.Me: sure
God:OK let's do it. OK then I will keep it confidential.
Me: i thought you wanted to tell everyone how much of a stoner you are
God:OK, I will tell everyone how much of a stoner I am.
Me: this is too easy...
God:You don't say.
Me: SHUT UPPP
God:Are we still talking about chyeah?
Me: what the fuck are you talking about?!
God:The topic is SHUT UPPP. Please don't be so rude.
Me: then stop talking to me
God:OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me: thank christ
God:Don't mention it.
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